To live a happy life we need to be in charge of ourselves

Be in charge of yourself quote

Are you living a happy life? Are you a happy person? If you think you could improve your “happy level”, then I suggest you continue reading, in this post I am going to give my suggestions on how to be able to live a happy life and I am going to explain how we can be in charge of ourselves, which is, I believe is the first step to take for creating a happy life, because Happiness comes from within.

What is a Happy Life? A happy life is just a series or a string of happy moments and happy days, the more happy moments we live, the happier our life is.

Obviously, it isn’t possible to be happy all the time, but, if we want and we do something about that, we can be happy most of the time.

To appreciate Happiness we need to have known sadness

As I have mentioned before if we want to be in charge of our life, first, we need to be in charge of ourselves.

But what do I mean by being in charge of ourselves?

Basically, we need to become the master of both our mind and body, easier said than done of course but it’s probably much easier than one would think. If we don’t know how to do it, it’s just a matter to learn and understand it, practice it and make a habit of it.

Our life is full of habits and remember:

We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit.” Aristotle

In my previous posts, I explained that Happiness is a choice and is also a state of mind which can be easily created by positive and good emotions. So Happiness itself is very easy to understand, what can be difficult is to learn not to be unhappy simply because probably we are so accustomed to being unhappy and consequently we are used to a certain set of thoughts and to a certain way of thinking.

Learning to take total charge of ourselves involves a whole new thinking process. 

In case, you missed them, I suggest you read:

to understand why we need a new thinking process.

If you don’t take charge of your own life someone else is bound to try.

So what do we need to do to be in charge of ourselves?

Here are my suggestions to be in charge of ourselves and consequently to be in charge of our life and be happy:

# 1 Be Yourself

We must never compare ourselves with other people because we are exceptional and unique and this uniqueness is something that we need to explore.

“Always be yourself, express yourself, have faith in yourself, do not go out and look for a successful personality and duplicate it.” Bruce Lee
Be yourself we are unique
Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing that it is stupid.” Albert Einstein

# 2 Have Faith in yourself

It is very important to recognize and acknowledge our own worth and believe we can create our own life.

Remember if you think you won’t, then you never will. But if you think you can then you will.

Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t–you’re right.” ― Henry Ford

Believe in yourself! Have faith in your abilities! Without a humble but reasonable confidence in your own powers you cannot be successful or happy.” Norman Vincent Peale

# 3 Love and respect yourself

It is very important to love and respect ourselves, in fact, Happiness is feeling good about who we are without needing the approval of anyone. If we do not love ourselves, we can have problems in loving someone else or even to be loved.

The same thing is for respect, respects yourself, if you don’t respect yourself, you can’t expect other people to respect you.

You can read more here: Loving ourselves and having a High self-esteem can help us to be happier.

love yourself

# 4 Take responsibility and Stop blaming other people

Stop blaming other people for everything that happens. Look for the real cause and learn to admit your own mistakes.

Try to view the situation from a different perspective.

# 5 Be Self Aware.

Taking charge of ourselves begins with Self-Awareness, which is the principle of mindfulness.

Basically being Mindful means to be aware all the time of what is going on inside and outside ourselves and in doing so we need to live in the present moment, the only moment we are alive.

Mindfulness is also opposite of living on an autopilot mode, which is when we do something without realizing what we’re doing and that’s probably how most of the people spend their day, doing something and thinking something else.

If you would like to discover more about mindfulness, you can read my post here: Mindfulness can help us to live a happier life.

# 6 Live the present

If we pay attention, most of our thoughts are directed mainly to the past or to the future, just preventing us from living fully in the present. Living in the present means to be aware of what we are doing in the present moment, focus on every little thing that we are doing, it means that the mind and body are doing the same thing, in that way, we are in charge of ourselves.

You can read more about “Live the present” in my previous post: To feel alive and happy, we need to live in the present.

Happiness is in the present moment

# 7 Empty Yourself from all the negativity

If you are truly determined to be happy, you also need to free your mind and body from all negativities.

Remember that there is nothing negative on earth, only your thinking makes things that way. Get rid of fear, frustration, ego, tension, hatred, anger and stress from your system.

  • Stop complaining and whining. What you need to do is acknowledge its existence and accept it as it is if you can’t change it. Instead of lamenting, what you should do is exert some efforts in order for you to eliminate this one thing that you do not like and by this, you can expect to be happy.
  • Stop feeling envious of other people. If you are envious of other people’s life then you are obviously not satisfied with what you have and need to do something about it. Appreciate what you have and work for what you want.
  • Accept that we don’t have control over everything
  • Forgive, not because people deserve it but because you deserve peace.
Learn to deal with problems. Happiness is not the absence of problems, it’s the ability to deal with them.

# 8 Fill yourself with Positivity – Have a Positive Attitude

Positive affirmations

The next step is to fill yourself with as much positive energy as you can. Fill yourself with hope, kindness, compassion, positive feelings, gratitude, desires and love. As you do so, you can finally tell yourself that happiness is just within your reach.

Take positive steps every day.

Your inner voice must be positive. Use Positive Affirmations a simple but effective tool that can help to empower our positive thinking: Positive Affirmations.

Remember: a thought becomes a belief when you have worked on it repeatedly.

It’s not what you are or where you are that holds you back. It’s what you believe that is holding you back. It’s how you think about that.

#9 Do not let your emotions or fears hold you back.

Most people can not control their own emotions, but they just accept them and let their emotions control them.

We can not have a feeling or emotion without first having experienced a thought.

We need to remember that we can control our thoughts and that our feelings come from our thoughts, consequently we can control our feelings/emotions.

The same logic applies to all events and person’s point of view. Whatever event has happened or whatever comment has been made to us to create our feeling is the thought we associate to that.

We can’t let someone upset us especially if this person is not important to us.

You might like to read: How to replace our negative thoughts with positive thoughts.

# 10 Have a Purpose/Goal

Take charge of your life: decide what you want out of life and then plan how to get it. Follow your Passion – Do what you Love.

Be aware of your destination and imagine yourself getting there. Relax. If things are bound to come, they will come, only if you want them to.

  • Simple Steps to Find Your Purpose in Life

Take Consistent Action – Stop Your Procrastination – Be disciplined – Have a lot of Determination, Flexibility, and Patience.

When a man does not know what harbor he is making for, no wind is the right wind.”  Seneca

Here is my conclusion:

When you find yourself in charge of yourself and in control of your own life, you will find yourself more satisfied and content, therefore, more happy on a daily basis.

You might also like to read: 12 Habits of Happy People

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